Religious offence

There is a lot of discussion about whether or not eating in public in the month of Ramadan is appropriate. There are polls, there are angry conservative and liberal people, the works. This heated of an argument over matters like this could only occur in Malaysia lah. My opinion on this is the same as my opinion on anything when it comes to religion and belief ; to each its own.

So the whole fiasco started in relation to women on their periods and whether they should be allowed to eat in public. Islam very clearly forbids women on their periods to fast during Ramadan, so to me, why is it such a big deal if someone who already can't fast chooses to eat in public? Some people will question, why do you want to show off your period? 'Period tu aib, kena senyap senyap.' I don't think Islam ever said that menstruation was something to be ashamed of, something we should hide and keep quiet to ourselves. All the shame around menstruation stems from cultural belief, not religious ones, and Ramadan is first and foremost a religious experience (or at least it should be...) To be honest, eating in public sometimes is just a matter of convenience, its not that we want to show off that we're on our periods. Where would you expect women to eat anyway? In their cramped hot cars? In public toilet stalls? Make the commute home, even if we're on strict lunch break hours? Or is it because our society still places a heavy expectation on women to cook, so we should be able to cook our own food and not have to go out to buy it. Would this same stereotype be put on men if they had their religiously condoned off days too? The other thing is we have to try and understand why women can't fast on their periods anyway. I read once that it so because Allah understands what women go through whilst on their periods, and so we get breaks. Menstruation isn't fun, you are literally bleeding non-stop, you get cramps and aches, you smell funny, your hormones are at an all time high, you lose a lot of water because you're bleeding, the list doesn't stop. I mean, Allah gave us a break, why can't society? 

Then the bigger question came about, should anyone born a Muslim eat in public during Ramadan? I feel its important to stress the born a Muslim part, because some people born into Islam don't believe in Islam to begin with, and its sad that Malaysia doesn't recognise that. For these people, Ramadan becomes a meaningless forced upon hunger. I know that in this country my opinion is unpopular, but shouldn't your beliefs and religious pursuits be personal. If for whatever reason people do not decide to fast, then its on them. Personally I am a practising Muslim, but I don't understand why I have to expect everyone else to be, especially since there is no compulsion in religion. If you are a fellow believer then don't you believe that the only judgement that does matter is Allah's? This logic is tantamount to saying, its okay if you don't believe, just pretend to believe in front of me so I can assume that I have done my role as a khalifah. Some people get offended because I guess to them its tempting to see another human being eat, but to me that goes back to you actively making the choice to observe the fast. You cannot expect the world to make the choice for you. Islam teaches patience and sincerity, and if you are going to be mad at someone for eating when you can't you are neither patient nor sincere. 

The one argument I find makes sense is that you are not respecting the holy month. It is after all a compulsory fast, choosing not to fast is sort of like saying 'fuck the police'. But even then, I don't know why we have to police matters of the heart. What you choose to respect is up to you, we do not need laws to police adab. If it is such a problem then we, as Muslims, have to find out why people aren't willingly fasting to begin with. Is there something we can do to educate them? Is our syllabus on religion that is taught in schools flawed? Is Ramadan turning into a cultural festivity, are we watering down the meaning of it and what can we do to combat that? How far one immerses themselves into religion, any religion, is personal. Sure, as Muslims we should do our best to be guides, but being publicly angry and loud would only steer people away from Islam. We are representatives of our religion, if we are seen to be narrow-minded, harsh and intolerant, then that is what our religion is viewed as too. As Khalifahs, your duty is to do your best at educating and making people understand, not to force people to comply. Even the prophets couldn't force people.

The over arching thought that I cannot ignore is that offence in this country has a narrow, racist definition. It is a sentiment only Malay Muslims can express, and only if our cultures/festivities are not respected is it ever a problem. Other cultures, other religions, other races, they don't have the space to even be offended, because they are less significant in the eyes of the typical malay muslim. We eat beef in front of Hindus, we make fun of the angry ghost festival and chap goh meh, but their offence is not registered as being significant. The other day, One Dance by Drake came out on the radio, and they censored the word Hennessy, which is a brand that sells alcohol, and legit the ONLY demographic that could be offended are Muslims. And even then, why is it offensive? Will hearing the brand name make you murtad, why is your iman so fragile? I am forever baffled at why we demand respect in the way that we do. We shouldn't, no other demographic demands respect. We should not assume ourselves as more than, just because we were born into the lives that we were born into. The truth is, respect that is demanded will never be true respect. Respect is organic, and that is something Malays need to learn.

I apologise if this post ruffles a few feathers. If you have opposing thoughts, or want to discuss anything, feel free to email/text or even comment below. I welcome discourse of all sorts, and I understand there is bound to be people who disagree. But I do hope you give the idea of tolerance a thought. Have we achieved it? Shouldn't we try? 

Love,

Mira